through the glass

so its been a little bit of a rough week with our youngest boy. he got frustrated outside and hit the neighbor girl on the hand with a metal shovel. he then got in very big trouble by both parents, and got his video games taken away for the week.
it was total sadness for the boy on every level.
it is very humbling to think you have a good kid on the block, and then discover he is whacking little girls with garden tools.
we talked about it and realized maybe its not all ashton's fault, but our fault also.
as far as kids go, he is very easy. he entertains himself, he gets his own snacks, and rarely asks for anything. my other children are high maintenance in that regard. they want you to read to them, talk to them, listen to their stories, fix their snacks, take them places, just be near them and attend to them - a lot. he doesn't.
so i guess, we don't. we are busy every minute of the day, so if he is happy, we let him be. he plays a lot of wii, computer and legos. he plays outside on his own, he gets poptarts and water when he is hungry.
i really started feeling guilty about this after he whopped the little girl's hand.
i really got on to him, and he cried really hard.
it made me think about all the time he spends doing things my other kids didn't at his age. maybe he wouldn't of lost his cool if i spent more time interacting with him.
i took him and maggie to gymnastics this week, like i always do. its a parent/tot class, so i go into the gym with her and hop around, sing, and be silly - just her and i. he sits in the waiting room and plays legos.
its a 45 minute class, no big deal.
this week mr. chad (the teacher)got out the parachute. we were sitting around it singing wheels on the bus when i looked up at the viewing window.
through the glass i see ashton just staring out at us. just standing perfectly still, not sad, not happy, just watching. just watching his mama play with his little sister. watching and waiting for us to be done. he isn't in any activites, he doesn't get to go to a class and play parachute with his mama. i can't even type this without getting a physical pain in my stomach.
live and learn i guess.
try harder.
do better.
don't ever look up and see a sweet face watching you through the glass again.

the virgin mary

i was looking at old pictures on the computer with maggie today. we ran across some of me when i was very large and pregnant with little maggie. i said maggie - that is you in my tummy, you lived in there before you were born. she said, "i was in dare under your shirt?" and i said yes, inside my tummy until you were ready to come out, see how big it was? she kind of looked down at her own protruding belly and that was that.
we really didn't talk about it anymore, just kept looking at pictures.
later that day, my mom and dad (against their better judgement) let her spend the night at their house for the first time.
i got a phone call from my mom around 5AM wanting to tell me a funny story about the evening.
maggie approached my mom and patted her big round belly.
she said "gwandma, i hab a baby in my belly."
my mom says, "oh you do?"
maggie says "yes, he's been in dare a long time and im sabing him in dare."
my mom says, "well what is his name?"
maggie says "well gwandma, his name is jesus."

uncomfortable moments

I took miss maggie with me to home depot today. i needed to purchase the ceiling fan, light fixture and mirror for the downstairs bathroom and bedroom.
we made our selections and i was walking through the nearly empty store when a lady who worked there walked in front of us. she was kind of husky and had a boyish looking haircut. they all wear those little vests and slacks, so i guess could be interpreted as male or female clothing.
my daughter thinking she had really figured something out for this gal starts yelling at her.
"haaaaay, you are a booooy!! i am a giwl, and you are a boy. i a giwl, you a boy."
she just kept it up, and i had no idea what to do. finally a dad and son come around the corner and hallelujah i say "yes maggie, he is a boy, he is a daddy, and that is his little boy."
close call.
once again.

no shirt no shoes no service

it has been another crazy week around our household. we are finishing our basement, getting ready for easter, and trying to fit in kids activities around it all.
i was taking ashton to preschool tuesday, along with maggie and the dog so that the workers would not have to step over them.
i loaded them all up in the van with 8 minutes to get there on time.
we pull in right at 9am and i am trying to keep the puppy in the van, haul maggie out of her seat and get ashton in the school.
he hops to the van door and says to me
"mommy, did you remember my shoes?"
i look down at his socked feet and respond
"well, no buddy i didn't. who's job is it to remember your shoes?"
he just stared at me.
i thought about this.
isn't this one of those moments where you are defined as a helicopter parent or a love and logic parent? i mean, i felt bad making him walk in there with no shoes, and i felt plenty stupid myself. but its a chance to teach a lesson, right?
love and logic it was, since i had no time to run home anyhow.
i walked my very embarassed boy into his classroom and explained to his teacher, the directer and the handful of nosy parents who had gathered around my explanation.
"i told him the van is leaving in five minutes, get ready to go, this was his idea of being ready, so that is how he is coming to school."
his teacher asked me how i thought this would go over.
"im not sure, but i betcha he won't forget again."

so far, he has not.