your knees

i heard this song that scared me the other day. the line in it went something like "i guess we're all just a phone call away from our knees"
isn't that the truth?
i mean, i see terrible things happen to families every day, i hear about things that make me shudder.
beautiful little three year old's come into urgent care with an upset tummy and leave with a giant terminal tumor in their belly. their family's lives are changed from that day forth. i get to sit back and read about it on their blog, pray for them, thank god it is not my family.
i pray to god every night. i pray for him to please keep my family safe. please keep my children, brother's, friends, and parents healthy. please please please don't let tragedy strike me.
and then i get scared, like, if he thinks im too afraid of it, please don't test me, please don't show me i can handle it.
we have had our share of sadness, my husband lost his baby sister and his father within 11 months of each other a few years ago. both were phone calls received while life was normal. one morning we were sleeping and his aunt called to say his dad had died. one night i was at work and he called me and simply said "angie died." i was getting ready to go to lunch, i was laughing with my friends. i still remember who was standing on my sides as i held the phone. i remember driving to the hospital in the middle of the night.
phone calls that bring you to your knees.
i got my own scare a couple of years ago when my dad nearly died on his birthday.
jeff and i had just gotten back from christmas shopping and my mom called. your father collapsed at the boat. he is at the hospital now, i don't know what is wrong with him. she was worried about thanksgiving dinner. and then another call on his next birthday (remember this).

but he lived! it was a miracle both times!! it was crazy and i still have my dad. my mom still has her husband. my babies still have their grandpa.
but then his doctor called my cell phone by mistake the other day after a routine cat scan.
my heart skipped a beat. i haven't thought much about it lately. he is here, i see him, he is fine.
but the doctor said his remaining aneurysms are growing. they are on his spine.
they will wait until he passes out again and then attempt to operate.

see what i mean? one phone call away from our knees.
so i preach it. i write about it every few months. love every minute. love every crazy, not exciting, not vacation, not christmas, not perfect moment minute. love the every day things.
love each other.
tell each other.